"Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for You are my praise." Jeremiah 17:14
I came home from bible study and checked the phone messages...it was the voice of my surgeon. That can never be good, right?!?! Right. I called him back immediately but he was with patients. He finally called back and gave me the news...unfortunately they didn't get a clean margin on one side of the tumor sight again! He called it a "close margin", it is 1.3mm. So it isn't a "positive margin" but it is not big enough for them to call a "clean margin" (which is 5mm). So after conferring with the radiation oncologist, they both decided that another surgery is necessary. Another surgery??? Are you kidding me?
As you can imagine I am very disappointed, but I was prepared for this. I guess! But I have some decisions to make now. They can just go in and take out more tissue in hopes they get clean margins. He sounded very positive that he would this time. Since he already has 1.3mm of clean tissue near the edge already. Or I can decide to do a simple total mastectomy. This would ensure that the cancer would be gone (duh!) and it would also eliminate the need for radiation.
I meet with my surgeon tomorrow morning (10am) to discuss all of the options-- then I will meet with my medical oncologist Thursday (4pm) to find out what she thinks.
This isn't what I had hoped for...but it is the card I have been dealt. So, I carry on! And I know that one day...one day very, very soon, I will be "cancer free"!
So, if you could, please pray for guidance for me in making this big decision I would really appreciate it.
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What a disappointment for you! I'm sorry you are left with this difficult decision. I hope that those who have been through this can provide you with information and insight. You will get through this! The path seems really hard right now, but you will!! Thinking and praying for you. Call me anytime to talk...day or night.
ReplyDeleteI am continuing to pray for you! I know that the Lord will show you exactly which way to go! The Lord is faithful and He will be your Strong Tower in this time of need!
ReplyDeleteYou are so full of faith and it encourages me daily.
Love you
Mandy,
ReplyDeleteYou know I'm praying for you. I have faith that you will endure my friend. Keep your faith in the Lord- He is with you through all of this. And so are we!! I love you and will continue to believe that you will be lead to the right decision for you and most importantly, will have peace with your decision. Love you!
I'm so sorry for this news, Amanda -- I will pray for your guidance and strength as you ponder this. Please know I love you and am always here to talk. You will be "cancer free" soon -- you continue to get closer to that each and every day.
ReplyDeleteMandy,
ReplyDeleteGET A SECOND OPINION. With DCIS it is completely ridiculous for anyone to raise mastectomy. You need a second opinion before you let anyone cut you open again. Every time there is surgery, the risk of infection rises and given how poorly the surgeries have gone so far, I would be extremely cautious before letting this guy near me ever again.
I realize I am being opinionated here, but I was forced into mastectomy because I had invasive cancer throughout my breast. DCIS should not require that radical a choice.
Every woman has to make her own decisions about breast cancer treatment. But please take time to get another surgeon and oncologist to look at your films and biopsy results. You are not even at stage 1, so there is time to get informed. Whatever decision you make is one you'll live with for a very long time.
Finally remember, the doctors work for you!
Andrea
Mandy,
ReplyDeleteOf ALL the people I can remember from High School, you have to be one of the toughest women I can remember. You are a very strong soul with great determination. If ANYONE can persevere through something like this, it is you!
With the Lord tightly knit by your side, you will do quite well. Lean on Him in your moments of fear and frustration (which are totally normal, by the way) and allow Him to calm you. He is the mightiest and most loving Father of all, and you are His most precious child. Put it all in His hands and allow Him to do the work. He is our Father and our practitioner.
I will continue to pray for your strength, your patience, your healing, your release of personal will, and your full trust upon Him, as well as, great amounts of loving support from your friends and family.
Much love to you Mandy,
In Christ,
Kelli
Mandy,
ReplyDeleteI hope you find comfort in the posts from your friends. It is quite evident how much you are loved and how much strong faith encircles you! I know your faith and heart are in the right place and know that so many prayers are being sent up daily. You will get thru this and be a better, stronger person on the other side.
I will do whatever I can to help. Just let me know what you need.
Hang in there Sweetie and BELIEVE that you are going to be fine!
Much Love,
Carole
Dear Amanda,
ReplyDeleteI found your blog when doing a search on DCIS. I was diagnosed in October. My prayers are with you in this latest treatment decision you have to face. I am comforted and encouraged by your faith in God. I only had to have one lumpectomy and for what it's worth, I can tell you that my experience of radiation treatment was good -- minor side effects. I will pray for you in your decision with the different set of parameters that you face. I'm glad you are blessed with many friends and a supportive family.
Cheering you on,
Lisa Vernon
I am overwhelmed and overjoyed by all the people that surround me! I love this blogging thing. It has given me such a comfort and has been a wonderful outlet to share my emotions and my joys and frustrations. Thank you all for reading it and for loving me! I am humbled by your prayers and your faith in me.
ReplyDeleteThat last comment was from me...Amanda!
ReplyDelete